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The case of the missing apostrophe! Can you find the place where it goes? #grammarmatters https://t.co/hJQOYXWsOO

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Even a simple typo can make a difference to your customers. Here, T-Mobile made the goof. #alwaysproofread https://t.co/w8TDe1Vlqk

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Even a simple typo can make a difference to your customers. Here, T-Mobile made the goof. #alwaysproofread https://t.co/w8TDe1Vlqk

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Wikipedia article of the day for October 17, 2017

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Wikipedia article of the day is Roland TR-808. Check it out: ift.tt/1A0A8VJ

What are you including in YOUR #marketing efforts? https://t.co/Qao0SUNiIM

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#RandomQuestion: What's your favorite local chamber? #SupportYourLocalChamberofCommerce https://t.co/3eUfwwHYGE

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The #FolksbierTastingRoom has been listed as the No.1 Brewery Taproom in NYC by @grubstreet with some of the best breweries around. Link to the article in our bio ⬆ @rbcobeach @kcbcbeer @threesbrewing @thebronxbrewery

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The #FolksbierTastingRoom has been listed as the No.1 Brewery Taproom in NYC by @grubstreet with some of the best breweries around. Link to the article in our bio ⬆ @rbcobeach @kcbcbeer @threesbrewing @thebronxbrewery

Hippie Is Necessary, 1967, 30 of 32

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Hippie Is Necessary, 1967, 30 of 32

Hippie Is Necessary, 1967, 30 of 32

Twin peaks

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Twin peaks

The Problem With The Warcraft Movie No One’s Talking About

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The Problem With The Warcraft Movie No One’s Talking About

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When the first few Warcraft movie trailers came out, I was totally blown away. More so than any other video game adaptation, it actually looked like they were staying true to how the game seems. The oversized armor, the weird colors — “its like” watching all the wasted weekends from my early adolescence be submitted to glorious life.

I kept instinctively trying to click on the characters and stimulate them say funny things .

Well, I find Warcraft opening night, and while it’s definitely the most faithful video game adaptation ever, it only isn’t faithful enough. The movie is a failing not just for being bad but for insulting everything we love about Warcraft . I severely don’t understand the mistakes made by director Duncan Jones, novelists Charles Leavitt and Chris Metzen, and Blizzard Entertainment. It’s seriously baffling how different this movie is from the games that stimulated Warcraft a household name.

The first and biggest problem is that there’s not a single scene to be given to resource gathering, and, even stranger, I don’t know how many resources the heroes have! Some of my favorite childhood memories involve clicking on my Town hall, clicking the “build peasant” button, waiting for about 20 seconds, then telling that peasant to mine gold or chop wood. Then I’d click on the Town Hall again and click the “build peasant” button one more time, wait for 30 more seconds, and then tell him to mine gold or chop timber. “Right, m’lord! ” he’d chirp, and once more I’d click on the Town Hall and then click on the “build peasant” button. After I’d built up a few peasants, I’d run out of food and have to have a peasant build a farm so I’d have the food to construct more peasants. Then I’d have another peasant build a barracks and, eventually, click on that coveted “build footman” button and begin building my army. “Not enough food … build more farms, ” the game would say, so I’d click on a peasant moving between the Town hall and the Goldmine, but he’d disappear into the mine before I could get the mouse over to the “build farm” button, and I’d have to find another peasant to click on. It’s a fast-paced, riveting experience, and I couldn’t wait to see it re-created on-screen.

I know these sprites better than I know my mother’s face .

So you’ll be disappointed to learn that there isn’t any resource gathering in Warcraft at all. In fact, I don’t remember a single Goldmine appearing on-screen, or any characters even mentioning how much gold they have at their disposal! At one point, there are a bunch of trees nowhere near a Town hall, and I started quaking with exhilaration at the prospect of assuring a scene where a peasant constructs a Lumber Mill so he can harvest the timber more quickly. I actually thought that was the direction that scene was going. But instead we just get a stupid scene where characters opposed and learn new information to propel the plot forward. A useless, disappointing waste of time. I don’t know what the fuck any of them were thinking.

I had faith that Duncan Jones, the director of the phenomenal Moon , would understand that the heart of Warcraft is keeping track of gold and wood and spending that gold and wood on the creation of elven archers and footmen, but apparently he aspires to some loftier, more “artsy” ideas and therefore couldn’t give the true fans what we really want.

Wondering how many made phases Lothar has? Or whether his attack crit’d? Warcraft can’t be bothered to tell you .

Another huge problem is that we don’t see anyone building a base. What greater pleasures does Warcraft hold for small children than letting them decide where to build a blacksmith? Or realizing that if you surround your archer-towers with farms, the adversary AI won’t be able to attack it with melee units? There are few memories I cherish as much as those of upgrading my Town Hall to a Keep and finally a Castle, so that I could eventually build a Mage Tower and start pumping out sick-ass mages. I couldn’t wait to watch a scene where a peasant is issued an order to build by some unseen higher power and dives face-first into the dirt to begin constructing a massive Mage Tower all by himself. In fact, I expended the whole two-and-a-half hour runtime hoping for a single scene that’d scratch that itch.

Boy was I frustrated. Warcraft constructs the ridiculous decision to begin the movie with all the human bases already built . And, strangely , nobody even discusses expanding them or house new ones so they can mine more resources. Admittedly, the orcs do construct some basis, but it all happens off-screen, probably to induce more room for the aforementioned combat and exposition scenes. When one character, the mage Khadgar, explains that as small children his parents dedicated him to the wizard council to be raised by them, I got the feeling I was supposed to be moved by his tragic backstory. But because the movie never even mentions where the Mage Tower is, or when they construct it, or whether they had decided to develop mages or gryphon riders first, I was wholly lost.

Wondering what this spell’s cooldown is? So is everybody else in the audience .

At the very least, I was hoping to see a scene where the heroes realize they have absent-mindedly trapped their army behind a wall of farmhouses, forcing themselves to have to blow up one of their own houses and garbage precious resources only to escape. I would’ve been happy with any kind of strategizing at all, even a single scene where a blacksmith agonizes over whether to upgrade the ground units’ assault or hitting points would’ve satisfied me. But it never comes up. Not once. That’s right: This is a Warcraft movie with perfectly no math.

Perhaps worst of all, we never even learn where the crafters of this war are from. The tale begins with Gul’Dan, an orc shaman, draining the life out of a community of Draenei to open a portal to Azeroth so his army of orcs can invade — and yet there’s not a single orc barracks visible. Where do they construct them? How speedily can they build more? Without the information collected, I have no idea how sad to be when characters die, because I haven’t the vaguest sense of how quickly they can be replaced.

How can I care about person if I don’t even know how much gold they cost ?

Lothar, Warcraft ‘s human protagonist, looks just like a gryphon rider by the fact that he is frequently riding a gryphon, but I never even insure a Gryphon Aviary. And if he is a gryphon rider, that just raises the question of where they got the 2,000 gold necessary to build him; 2,000 gold is a lot of gold. You can’t expect me to believe they just had that lying around. Also, where’s your sorcery thunder hammer, Lothar? I mean, come on.

It would’ve been so easy for Duncan Jones to include a scene where the hero Lothar says — and I’m simply spitballing here — “We require more men! Quick, construct two Barracks at the same hour and have some of those people chopping trees move over to the Goldmine for a while so that in about 45 seconds we’ll be able to build two footmen at once! ” Without that scene, I just kept checking my watch, eagerly anticipating my chance to go home and get lost in a narrative I was likely to understand, like Uncharted or Doom .

Got it .

Finally,( and this is perhaps the movie’s biggest problem) whoever is controlling the humans is a total mystery to me. Aside from the fact that he kinda sucks at micro( at one point, a wizard casts a barrier spell in the middle of his own divisions, blocking a few of them off and setting them up for easy pickings by the orc horde. LOL GG bro ). If I had known his win-loss ratio or even only his Battle.net account name ( Silent_Bob4 20 , perhaps ), I would’ve been able to tell if he was pro or not and whether he was into Kevin Smith movies. Instead , nothing. I’m expected to believe these characters are just making decisions on their own. Well, listen, Blizzard: Your AI has simply never been that good, and expecting us to believe otherwise stretches our suspension of incredulity much too far.

Look, Hollywood, it isn’t hard: Merely give me precisely the thing I want, exactly the style I want it, every time. But don’t worry — the movie hasn’t even been out for an entire week yet. Just do some quick reshoots and patch the scenes in, then I’ll stop sending you death threats.

JF Sargent is a senior editor and columnist for Cracked.com who was actually never able to beat Warcraft II. Follow him on Twitter and Facebook .

See how Super Mario Bros. is more faithful to Warcraft in Understanding The ‘World Of Warcraft’ Using ‘Super Mario Bros ., ‘ and learn how to become the BB King in The 5 Hardest, Most Pointless ‘World Of Warcraft’ Achievements . Subscribe to our YouTube channel to watch why it’s so hard to get hyped for movies in Why Every Movie Trailer Is The Same, and watch other videos you won’t watch on the site ! Also follow us on Facebook to unlock a special Cracked achievement.( The achievement is you liked Cracked on Facebook .)

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Wikipedia article of the day for October 19, 2017

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Wikipedia article of the day for October 18, 2017

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Hippie Is Necessary, 1967, 28 of 32

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Hippie Is Necessary, 1967, 28 of 32

Hippie Is Necessary, 1967, 28 of 32

7 Feb 1934 - "DEMOLISHING COOGEE PIER.", Sydney, New South Wales, Australia (restored version)

aussiejeff posted a photo:

7 Feb 1934 - "DEMOLISHING COOGEE PIER.", Sydney, New South Wales, Australia (restored version)

IMAGE INFO
- The Newspaper photographer's viewpoint is looking east from an elevated vantage point, near the entrance to the Coogee Oceanic Pier demolition site on Beach Street, Coogee.
- On 13 Feb 1934 (one week after this photo was published), Harold Cooey (age 40, laborer of Redfern) slipped while working on the later stages of the Pier's demolition & fell 20' to the shoreline, suffering terrible compound fractures to his left leg. Sadly, he died one month later on 9 March 1934 in St Vincent's hospital from serious complications arising from his injuries.
****************************
HISTORIC SUMMARY
- Coogee Ocean Pier Co. Ltd. had been granted a 28 year lease to construct the Pier. Initial plans showed it extending a colossal 935' (285 meters) into Coogee Bay. The pier was to have a capacity to hold 21,000 people, with the massive pier head to contain a full size 1,400 seat theater, 600 dancer ballroom, first class restaurant, plus numerous shops & arcades. However, owing to a rapid funding crisis, the project eventually was only completed out to 590' (180 meters) in length - a long way short of the original plan. Even worse, all the pier head attractions mentioned above were also scrapped.
- To add to the developers financing headaches, unlike the calmer waters at Brighton, the incessant pounding, powerful surf that regularly smashed into the pier with every south-easterly "blow" were unrelenting. By as far back as January 1930, the developers had already sunk £78,300 into the project - a staggering $7,000,000 in todays money. Unsurprisingly, they never made any profit during the short life of the project. The Coogee Oceanic Pier Co. went into liquidation in May 1932, with the semi-complete loss-making Pier passing into the hands of Randwick Council by default.
- The Pier was immediately closed to the public following the collapse of the Company, while Council officers & engineers inspected the Pier for costings on urgently needed repairs to continue with the amusement business.
- However, Randwick Council soon found it would be totally un-economical for them to resurrect the Pier as a going concern (with repairs alone estimated at £4,000 in May 1933 (over $480,00 today). Unsurprisingly then, with mounting financial losses over the period 1932-1933 the by-now-derelict pier remains were sold off for Demolition by Council for a relatively paltry £2,800 (around $230,000 today).
- The "Coogee Oceanic Pier" was finally consigned to history & demolished during the period December 1933-May 1934, but not before a massive storm & huge waves on 2 Feb 1934 (as well as a collapsed crane on 27 Apr 1934) caused significant damage & mayhem for the demolition crew during the process. It seems the Pier was problematic for many people, right up to the end!!
****************************
SOURCE INFO
- 1 x digitized newspaper image from page 16 of the Sydney Morning Herald, dated 7 Feb 1934.
- The original was digitized by the National Library of Australia (Trove Digitized Newspapers Collection) & is freely available from here - nla.gov.au/nla.news-article17045936
******************************
CREDITS
- Sydney Morning Herald for the original published newspaper image.
- National Library of Australia for their valuable work in digitizing, archiving & making publicly available online this rare historical content.
******************************
COPYRIGHT STATUS
- Per NLA dvice:
Out of copyright: created before 1955.
Copyright status was determined using the following information:
Material type: Printed Photograph
Published status: Published before 1954
Government copyright ownership: No Government Copyright Ownership.
- Regarding my own work in creating this unique, cropped, restored & duo-toned version from the copy of the digitized original, I have applied "Attribution-Non-Commercial-Share Alike".
*******************************
PROCESS INFO
- I made 4 x cropped screen captures of the digitized original at full resolution.
- Using Microsoft Image Composite Editor (ICE) I combined the 4 parts into one image.
- Using Adobe Photoshop Creative Suite 8.0, I adjusted some areas of uneven exposure, restored contrast & sharpness, removed some unwanted artifacts & used a dark sepia duo-tone curve for better tonal range.

Did you know that PRINCE died without leaving a will!?

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Hippie Is Necessary, 1967, 29 of

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Hippie Is Necessary, 1967, 29 of

Hippie Is Necessary, 1967, 29 of

29 Nov 1933 - "END OF COOGEE'S PIER", Sydney, New South Wales, Australia (restored version)

aussiejeff posted a photo:

29 Nov 1933 - "END OF COOGEE'S PIER", Sydney, New South Wales, Australia (restored version)

IMAGE INFO
- The Newspaper photographer's viewpoint is looking east from an elevated vantage point on the eastern end of the yet-to-be demolished entry building of the Coogee Oceanic Pier fronting Beach Street, Coogee.
- Coogee Ocean Pier Co. Ltd. had been granted a 28 year lease to construct the Pier. Initial plans showed it extending a colossal 935' (285 meters) into Coogee Bay. The pier was to have a capacity to hold 21,000 people, with the massive pier head to contain a full size 1,400 seat theater, 600 dancer ballroom, first class restaurant, plus numerous shops & arcades. However, owing to a rapid funding crisis, the project eventually was only completed out to 590' (180 meters) in length - a long way short of the original plan. Even worse, all the pier head attractions mentioned above were also scrapped.
- To add to the developers financing headaches, unlike the calmer waters at Brighton, the incessant pounding, powerful surf that regularly smashed into the pier with every south-easterly "blow" were unrelenting. By as far back as January 1930, the developers had already sunk £78,300 into the project - a staggering $7,000,000 in todays money. Unsurprisingly, they never made any profit during the short life of the project. The Coogee Oceanic Pier Co. went into liquidation in May 1932, with the semi-complete loss-making Pier passing into the hands of Randwick Council by default.
- The Pier was immediately closed to the public following the collapse of the Company, while Council officers & engineers inspected the Pier for costings on urgently needed repairs to continue with the amusement business.
- However, Randwick Council soon found it would be totally un-economical for them to resurrect the Pier as a going concern (with repairs alone estimated at £4,000 in May 1933 (over $480,00 today). Unsurprisingly then, with mounting financial losses over the period 1932-1933 the by-now-derelict pier remains were sold off for Demolition by Council for a relatively paltry £2,800 (around $230,000 today).
- The "Coogee Oceanic Pier" was finally consigned to history & demolished during the period December 1933-May 1934, but not before a massive storm & huge waves on 2 Feb 1934 (as well as a collapsed crane on 27 Apr 1934) caused significant damage & mayhem for the demolition crew during the process. It seems the Pier was problematic for many people, right up to the end!!
****************************
SOURCE INFO
- 1 x digitized newspaper image from page 20 of The Sun (Sydney), dated 29 November, 1933.
- The original was digitized by the National Library of Australia (Trove Digitized Newspapers Collection) & is freely available from here - nla.gov.au/nla.news-article230203264
******************************
CREDITS
- The Sun (Sydney) for the original published newspaper image.
- National Library of Australia for their valuable work in digitizing, archiving & making publicly available online this rare historical content.
******************************
COPYRIGHT STATUS
- Per NLA dvice:
Out of copyright: created before 1955.
Copyright status was determined using the following information:
Material type: Printed Photograph
Published status: Published before 1954
Government copyright ownership: No Government Copyright Ownership.
- Regarding my own work in creating this unique, cropped, restored & duo-toned version from the copy of the digitized original, I have applied "Attribution-Non-Commercial-Share Alike".
*******************************
PROCESS INFO
- I made a suitably sized, cropped screen capture of the digitized original.
- Using Adobe Photoshop Creative Suite 8.0, I enlarged the image by ~20%, adjusted some areas of uneven exposure, restored contrast & sharpness, removed some unwanted artifacts & used a dark sepia duo-tone curve for better tonal range.

5 Things Only Poor Teens Understand About Poverty

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5 Things Only Poor Teens Understand About Poverty

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Unless you’ve lived through it, you can’t understand poverty. Not actually. Mentally put yourself in their shoes all you want, but it’s nearly impossible to imagine anything beyond the very surface phase of “I don’t have any fund — I sure wish I did.” But the problems that poor people face are so much deeper than that. Especially if you’re a teen who’s already trying to survive the five-year onslaught of demon juice that constructs you question your own existence in the first place. Adding poverty to their already-towering heap of horseshit just makes it so much worse.

I have an immense amount of sympathy and respect for those kids, because in most cases, they’re in a situation they can’t control. They simply have to grit their teeth and ride it out until they’re old enough to take the reign themselves. In the meantime, they’ve learned a few things about poverty that the average American will never understand. For example …

# 5. That Stinky Kid At School Probably Can’t Help It

Remember that scene in Willy Wonka [ or Charlie ] And The Chocolate Factory in which Charlie finds some fund on the street, and then spends it on candy because he’s a selfish little bastard? In an actual impoverished family, there would have been a whole lot less “You shouldn’t sell that ticket you detected, ” and a whole lot more “You fucking bought what ?! We’ve been out of milk for a week! We’ve been wiping our ass on old newspapers and selling blood to keep the suns on! We’re out of sugar and butter and eggs and bread … “

The remaining hour or so of that movie would have just been that list, and nowhere in that worsened ranting would you hear the word “deodorant.” Because when you’re hurting for the essentials, deodorant is a luxury. So is laundry soap. The average person doesn’t set much supposed into which soap does what chore — you simply buy it because you know you need it. But when you’re poor, the whole soap industry is a cruel, ridiculous joke. There’s one various kinds of soap for your body. Another for your hair. A soap induced specifically for dishes. Another for laundry. In the eyes of a poor person, if you have hand soap on the bathroom sink, you might as well be Bill Gates.

Don’t patronize me, asshole .

So in a lot of poor households, there are two kinds of soap: a bar that you use for your ass and hair, and a big-ass receptacle of the cheapest dish soap you can find for dishes and laundry. Because 40 ounces of cheap laundry soap costs about five times more than an equal quantity of inexpensive dish soap. What you don’t realise until you’ve lived through ghetto laundry is that laundry soap is designed with a sort of incense reek — or at least with chemicals that are made specifically to eliminate crotch funk. Dish soap isn’t. So using that attains even “clean” clothes still reek weird.

There’s also a pretty good chance that you don’t own a washer and dryer. When I was a kid, there would be A Assemble at the beginning of each month. An nearly supernatural migration of the poor, which has recently cashed their welfare checks and now had between two weeks and a month’s worth of rinsing to catch up on at the laundromat. Laundromats are hygiene prostitution: expensive and eerily sticky, so you don’t go very often. Many times, you find yourself digging out the least dirty outfit from the hamper, because it’ll be another week before you can afford to go back and clean your clothes again.

“While I’m at it, I think there’s room for me to get a quick bath.”

So now you’ve done your laundry, but you’ve used all of your dish soap in the process. Your clothes still smell various kinds of weird, but it’s better than what it was. Now your dishes are piling up because you have no fund to buy more soap until you get paid again. The longer they sit, the worse they smell. You haven’t changed the trash in a couple of days because it’s not full yet, and when you’re poor, you learn to waste nothing — not even a simple garbage bag. The cat’s shit box requires changed, but litter is waaaay down on your listing of budget priorities. There’s a pretty good chance that at least one member of your household smokings. And it doesn’t take long for all of that to work its style through the house and into your favorite Nickelback shirt. Which curiously stimulates the shirt way more Nickelback than it was when you first bought it.

The worst proportion is this: You know how if you put on perfume or cologne, you stop smelling it after about 30 minutes? The same thing happens with funky stink odors. You going to see school, thinking you smelling just fine, but your classmates start weeping from 50 feet away. Before you know it, you’re being relentlessly mocked, and you have no notion why.

“You don’t deserve to be in our hip graffiti room! ”

And the argument of “clean your house and take a shower” isn’t always the answer. Take all the rains you want — if you don’t have deodorant, you’re going to start smelling like sweat in a couple of hours. If you don’t have the chemicals to clean your house, then you’re merely wiping stuff down with a wet rag, which doesn’t do shit for the stink. And don’t even start with that “They’re just too lazy to clean” bullshit. I mentioned in this article that 91 percentage of government benefits go to the disabled, elderly, and running households. Of those who have the ability to clean, many of them are working two part-time chores a day, while their kids spend eight hours at school and the other three hours doing homework. Time is every bit as exhausted as their income.

# 4. Your Looks Are Based On Your Parents’ Artistic Ability

Haircuts were the bane of my existence when I was a kid. Paying for one is out of the question, so you have to get them at home. Mama could never get my hair even on both sides, so I looked like someone had stapled a wig to my scalp. Dad would do it when he was 30 brews deep, so I’d come out looking like Moe from The Three Stooges . If your parents suck at cutting hair, then you set that shit off for as long as possible. Fuck fashion, that is why a lot of poor kids have long hair or buzz cuts. If you’ve ever seen a poor person come to school with a entirely bald head, it means that either his mom fucked up the haircut so badly that it was less humbling to only shave it, or he got head louse and they couldn’t afford the shampoo to kill them, so they set his head on fire.

And you can’t merely throw some mousse into a bad haircut and make it all spiky like you meant to go for the shaggy boulder superstar seem. Recollect the deodorant thing I only fucking “was talkin about a” ? Hair care products are even further down on the listing of necessities. They might as well be sandwiched between “new Porsche” and “that awesome spinny blade thing from Krull . “

Your parents’ artistic ability also dictates how you seem from the neck down. Clothes are hand-me-downs, so you either have to be fine with wearing jeans that haven’t been in style since your mom’s hymen was intact, or you hope that she knows how to spruce them up with dye or scissors or some sort of artwork that builds you look like a grungy alternative rebel.

Or an insufferable hipster twat .

Sometimes, as was the case when I was in high school, the world determined on pull its unlubed fist out of your asshole just long enough to give you a breather. My breather came in the form of heavy metal and eventually the Grunge Era, and it felt magnificent. Holey, ripped-up jeans came into manner, and that meant that every single shitty pair of gasps I owned were finally not embarrassing to wear. Even the severely stained ones were awesome. In fact, the more stained and nasty the latter are, the very best they looked … and trust me, I was nuts-deep in nasty stained gasps. Good luck sleeping tonight with that image in your head.

Again, my mom’s artistic talents came into play, but this time it was a good thing. She knew how to attain ripped jeans fray correctly so that they are able to didn’t definitely sounds like I merely stabbed them a bunch of hours with a steak knife in a fit of rage … which I actually did. She also knew that if you added simply the right amount of bleach to the wash, it would make the jeans look kind of stonewashed. Shut up, it was in style at the time.

Surprisingly, that artistic touch had a practical effect. When I entered high school, I grew really tall really fast, so most of my jeans were about three inches too short. But I found out that when you cut pits in them, the weight of the denim induces those rips open up, which attains the legs artificially longer. So after sprucing them up with a pair of scissors and fits of maniacal giggling, all of my old, tiny jeans were back on the market. And trust me, in the 1990 s, the ladies loved humen in tiny ripped-up jeans.

Hey, go up, my eyes are up here .

Well , not when I wore them, but when other guys did.

But as happy as I was that the Grunge Era induced looking like a strolling garage sale acceptable, it had some pretty heavy drawbacks. That’s because …

# 3. Fads Can Destroy Your Ability To Buy Clothes

Grunge was both a blessing and a curse. The upside was that we already owned most of the stuff that was getting popular. We were always stocked up on flannel shirts because the Dollar Store sold them for a couple of bucks, so we’d get tons of those at Christmas. Old shoes, combat boots, army coats … all of that stuff came from Goodwill, Salvation Army, and garage sale. And if all else failed, you could just put one over dad’s run clothes and you fit right in.

But once that fad kicked in, holy shit, our shopping was fucked virtually overnight. The cost of cloths jumped to $40 a piece. Combat boots and thermal undershirts cost as much as that high-priced preppy, sporty shit that all the rich kids were wearing a few years earlier. And it wasn’t just a suit of everything getting more expensive. There was something weirder at work.

DEVIL DOG !

See, we shopped at Goodwill and Wearable Toilet Paper because we had to. When shitty clothes came into style, everybody else started shopping there because they wanted to. Since middle-class and upper-class children had the money to buy “new” clothes, they inundated those stores and bought all of the very best stuff. Which, back then, entailed the shittiest stuff? It’s still hard to get onto straight-out in my head, even after all these years. The phase is that they bought out the clothes that were now in style.

Meanwhile, your family is still on the same clothes budget, which means that you still merely go shopping once a year( when you get your tax return ). So by the time you have the ability to buy new stuff, it’s like presenting up to a Thanksgiving dinner in January. All that’s left is bones, mold, and the corpses of the individuals who only didn’t have what it takes to handle the feast.

Pussy .

Now you have to find new places to shop, because even my parents, who couldn’t give less of a shit about how we dressed, were like, “No, we’re not buying this. You couldn’t even get away with wearing this shit ironically. Your classmates will beat you down out of sheer principle, and they would be justified.” Garage marketings excluded, the next-cheapest place for clothes shopping was Walmart. But even then, you’d be able to buy one pair of jeans for every five that you could have bought at Goodwill.

But wait, it gets worse. Because when you combine the three points I only talked about …

# 2. It’s Nearly Impossible To Build Friends

Because of the shitty clothes and the bad fragrances and the horrible haircut, you’re ostracized in school. Not simply from run-of-the-mill bullies, either. I don’t suppose I’m astonishing anyone by saying that kids can be assholes, but it gets so much worse when they want to look funny and edgy in front of their friends, and then you walk by.

They can’t fathom the idea that you didn’t construct the choice to seem and odor like that. They see you as a lazy, stinky asshole who never showers and doesn’t give a shit how he appears. You can’t explain to them that it’s out of your hands, because 1) that would be humiliating as fucking, and 2) they still wouldn’t understand it. They can’t. They’ve never lived through it. They will never understand what it’s like to position three dollars as a saving grace. To have to replace “shampoo” with “chicken” on your list of priorities. So they make fun of you, and that shit hurts like you wouldn’t believe. You walk away, wanting to die.

And for some reason, the theme to The Breakfast Club is playing .

But even if you’re luck enough to get hygiene products like that, you still have problems stimulating friends, because you can’t afford to go out with them. I can’t even begin to explain how embarrassing it is to have to turn down simple things like a trip-up to the bowling alley or a night at the movies because the only route you could go is if one of your friends paid for your shit. It gets so humiliating that you eventually only start making up excuses as to why you can’t used to go, and eventually you just come off as an antisocial prick.

So you end up coagulating with other poor person, because they understand what it’s like to have to do poor people activities — cards, campfires, lying about cow-tipping. And don’t get me wrong here; I’m not went on to say that impoverished friends aren’t real friends. But they always came with an unfortunately common drawback.

In my experience, many of those households were stressed to the breaking point. So much so that it attained it almost impossible to visit for more than a few minutes at a time. Dad is coping with the stress by pounding brew. At least two people in the house are constantly arguing. Since you’re a guest, they feel like they have to feed you, but they don’t have the entails, so more stress and remorse pilings up. It doesn’t take long to feel like a burden, even if all you did was stop in to say hi. Eventually, you figure out that it’s just a lower level of headache to stay home.

Just you, your yard, and your stupid riling elephant .

After a few years of that, you ultimately reach the end of this terrible, shitty period. Graduation is right around the corner, if you haven’t already fell out. You’re finally able to start your own career of “something to do with being rich” and fix this shit, so your own kids will never have to go through it. And that’s when you find out the worst thing of all …

# 1. You’re Expected To Carry On The Family Tradition Of Staying Poor

One thing that’s always driven me nuts is seeing some rich daddy’s boy inserted into a high-paying, high-profile undertaking. In the words of the immortal Mike Patton, “It shouldn’t bother me. No, it shouldn’t. But it does.” Weirdly, the easiest place to see this in action is in professional wrestling. Here’s Charlotte, daughter of Ric Flair, holding the WWE Diva’s Championship title, after only two months of being on the show TAGEND Goddammit, that title was MINE !

And everyone knows that The Rock was and is still occasionally a WWE wrestler. But if you’re not a fan of wrestling, you may not know that he is actually a third-generation performer. Both his father and grandfather were big-name wrestlers, and his grandmother was a promoter. Actually, instead of listing them all off, here’s a gigantic listing of wrestlers who are related.

Now, I’m not went on to say that they’re not talented and they don’t deserve their spots — many of these people are insanely good at what they do. What I’m saying is that people often overlook the fact that they have something a lot of poor people do not: somebody to teach them a specialized, moneymaking ability, and relatives and/ or friends who know the right contacts to get their foot in the door.

When I was growing up, the people in my family who constructed the most fund were working in petroleum refineries or actual oil fields. They built great fund, but they were also working 80+ hours per week, and were so tired when they got home that they couldn’t function. The other family members( the ones who had jobs) were all manual labour factory worker or cashiers at various stores and gas station. The skill sets they had were very limited, and the contacts they’d stimulated were for jobs that barely paid enough to survive, and often had no benefits at all. No sick time. No vacations. No insurance. “John, this is my administrator, Chad. He’s going to interview you for a position clean smeared shit off of the bathroom walls. It pays nine dollars per year.”

My mom was on welfare for a huge chunk of our lives, and when she ultimately did start working, it was as a housekeeper, getting paid under the table. For those of you too young to understand what that is, it means that she was getting paid in cash and wasn’t paying taxes on it. So even if she were to teach me her clean skills( which she did ), I’d still be in eventual trouble, because I thought it was totally normal to simply pocket cash and not report it as income.

But the overall thing that I, and many people like me, learned was what our parents knew: You apply for the job that’s the easiest to procure, and merely be happy that you have a undertaking at all , no matter what it is. It took me 35 years to violate that mindset, and when I finally did escape it, people were shocked. They patted me on the back and told me what a great job I did, like I make the lottery or something.

It’s because I wore my luck dress .

Sadly, “hitting the lottery” is the way it’s viewed, because breaking out of that perpetual buttfucking is a true rarity. So if you’re poor, let me say to you something that the rest of the world won’t. You perfectly can break out of that prison. It’s not easy. In fact, it’s the hardest thing I’ve ever done, but it is absolutely doable. Rather than think about all of the time, endeavor, exhaustion, and luck it’s going to take in order to induce that happen, though, start small. Start with learning a new skill that few other people can do, and figure out how to set that skill to work. Doing that isn’t going to fell you ass-first into a heap of money, but it’s an excellent start to breaking that mindset of “I will always hand people french fries for a living.” The longer you stay in that frame of mind, the harder it is to escape.

No, severely, close the window and go do that. We’ll is right there when you get back.

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The post 5 Things Only Poor Teens Understand About Poverty appeared first on ViraLovaMatic.

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